MY SPILLED CUP OF TEA.

Everything's changing. Makeup wont change myself. I don't wanna be her, I'm sick of overthink. I see my reflection wherever I go. I know some people feels as I do. I know how I came in, but I don't know how to come out. Pain is growing, fear is holding me. So many fights inside I can't deal with. I'm just writing some feelings, to try to bring them down. I'm not looking for compassion, I don't hope you to understand me. Trying to expel  my demons, writing to relieve.

And although it was hard to admit, she missed him. Occasionally he went through her head, all those memories, and that end. She was convinced that he didn't care, that didn't hurt ... how wrong she was. Every memory was digging thorns in her heart. And what hurts the most was thinking that she wouldn't have been so important for him. This wall that she  had built wasn't so tough as she thought.   Out of sight, out of mind. But what if he wasn't still out? Maybe she wasn't ready to say goodbye.  You still hurt me. And you'll hurt for a while.